Being social
I'm an introvert.
I've always been one.
But I've taught myself to be social.
To speak up.
To start conversations.
To walk into a room full of people and actually talk to them.
I can do it.
I'm even pretty good at it.
And I can enjoy it.
I like people.
I like conversations.
I like laughing with someone until neither of us remembers what we were talking about in the first place.
But being social wears me down.
Loud places.
Noise.
Too many conversations happening at the same time.
Too much happening around me.
Sometimes loud spaces make me feel like I need an escape.
Not because I'm having a bad time.
Not because I don't like the people I'm with.
I just need to get away from the noise.
Somewhere quiet.
Somewhere calm.
Somewhere I don't have to listen.
Or talk.
Or react.
Just for a while.
I don't want to escape the people.
Sometimes I just want to escape the noise.
And eventually, I need to go home.
Sit on the couch.
Watch something.
The dogs next to me.
Nobody expecting anything from me.
Nobody needing me to talk.
Just quiet.
For a long time, I thought being good with people somehow made me less of an introvert.
It doesn't.
I've just learnt how to be social.
And I'm proud of that.
But I'm also proud of being exactly who I am.
I'm not pretending to be someone else.
I don't need to pretend that I want to stay longer.
I don't need to pretend that being around people doesn't take energy.
I can enjoy people.
And still need to be alone afterwards.
Both can be true.
I'm an introvert.
A social one, sometimes.
And then I go home.
✨☕🩷
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